Yard Trash

I remember in Kansas that everyone seemed to have this same piece of yard trash. It was a board that was painted to look like an old woman bent over and your looking up the backside of her dress while it looks like she's doing yard work. It seems a little bent to me now that I look back at it.

You really don't see much of that here in Lodi. Yeah there is some, but it's a tradition that's dieing. It's a real shame. I'm not saying I like the stuff, but I must admit, when I'm driving down the street I stare into those yards with the windmills, and the 4 foot tall deer, and the 8 foot tall Elk (got a guy here in Lodi who has those), the Knomes, and all that kind of stuff.

When I moved into my current home there was yard trash all over, knomes and all kinds of stuff. A great big alligator in the back yard with red eyes. That thing must have been 50 pounds and 3 feet long it was huge. I got rid of all the little stuff, but I kept him around. He scared me, and I was afraid to throw him away. Those red eyes.

So one day it struck me, he could be happier else where. I could move him from my back yard to someone elses front yard. But who would want him? No one. So I thought, you know what would be great is I could hide him in someones front yard. So I thought of a lot of people. I could hide him in their bushes, but that wouldn't be right, I need to hide him where he could be seen! That doesn't seem to make sense, but it does.

See a lot of people around here don't do their own lawns. They have lawn services, everyone except me that is. So I thought I could hide him in a place where he can be seen by people passing by, but hidden in a place where the people who live in the home can't see him.

I found the perfect spot. I have this buddy Dennis who has a great front yard. It' s beautiful. I hid him in the front left corner of the yard right next to the sidewalk ready to snap up any little dog that wanders off the sidewalk and into the flower bed. The front door and garage are set to the right of the house, and he went un-noticed for a couple of weeks. I remeber driving by and chatting with my friend Dennis's boy Brian, and the alligator was a foot behind him. I felt safe in my car, but should alligator have wanted to he couldn't have taken Brian's leg off.

Eventually he was found. But to my suprise he became a bit of curiousity of sorts. People like him, and months later he's still there. Dennis has his home up for sale, and I'm wondering if he's bold enough to leave him in the yard. If so is the next home owner bold enough to leave him there.

This gave me a good idea for a game. So Suzi, myself, Mike, and Wendy took 8 pieces of yard trash that I bought at the dollar store, and we scattered it in friends front yards. They won't mind, I promise. If they do deny it, even if they read your blog deny it. With the same idea as before, hide it in plain view. See which peice of yard trash can make it the longest undetected. Last trip by the yards only one of the 8 people have found their trash. The other seven huge copper lady bugs, and huge copper dragon flies are still in place. It's been over two weeks.

Makes for a good cheap date. And I think it would be great if yard trash became popluar again. "Oooh look at the Jones's yard, they put a swan with a hole in it's back for a plant right there in their yard", but the Jones's have no idea it's in there.